Blinded By The Life

Madmen, griefers, spammers
and owners with ban hammers
a new avatar surmounts
With their things full of blings
as the sim owners sling
their bots to pack the count

With a soldier-pet on my shoulder
feelin' kinda bolder
I built a merry-go-round
with this very unpleasing sneezing and wheezing
the entire sim crashed to the ground

Some sim-stim builder-bim
was heading for the golden prim
flappin' his textures, poundin' his script
And some Barbie noob with giant boobs
was dancing with some penis dood
spewin' particles from his tip

And now young Claire, bad noobie hair
finally found a camping chair
and was stopping there to earn some bux
And some rude dood in Furry suit whispers
"Daddy's got some sexy boots,
try some thong stuff, I think you're stuck"


     And she was blinded by the Life
     Cut loose like a noob
     Another avie in the night
     Blinded by the Life
     She got rezzed but she never got tight
     She's gonna make it alright


Some big-shot coffee-pot
who formerly was something hot
a dreamer from the West
He says, "Forget the VR worlds
ride the modern business curls
that's where we'll make cash best."

And some lamerguys who never fly
said "we know what'll make 'em buy
let's send them some free gifts"
And the dethroned market drones
were mumbling over broken bones
usin' their blogs to pick some tiffs.


     And she was blinded by the Life
     Cut loose like a noob
     Another avie in the night
     Blinded by the Life
     She got stuck but she never got tight
     She's gonna make it tonight


Some gallery sister with her manager-mister
told me I got what it takes
She said "I'll turn you on, hun, to a sim so strong
if you rez those prims with the funky breaks."

And Go-Kart Linden was checkin' out the Primdom
to see if it was safe to finally sell
And little avie Teddy was playin' with his Stroker beddy
and asked me if I needed some Ls


Oh, the Crazy-tard was foamin' hard
she posted stuff that was bizarre
sayin' "You commies killed the splash"
Yes, and Jack-Hack, former flack
was tryin' hard to make it back
from a planet that simply crashed

Well, I teleported, but was thwarted
rezzed in the air, tour aborted
and tried to make my way back home
He said, "It's your fault that nothin's there
you're recalcitrant; it's over, square
it's a deathwatch, stop with the moan"

And now in Welcomeland, a giant hand
was slappin' noobies in the sand
hummin' a griefer tune
Yes, and the avatar said, "You're a 'tard
but first I'm gonna boot you hard
we're gonna teach those Mods to laugh too soon"

And some satrap land baron fap
was complainin' that she lost her tap
on the Anshe Chung strategy
Cause her homestead sim wasn't jammed to the brim
with renters bailing, looking grim
She'd bet on the downward spree


     She was blinded by the Life
     Cut loose like a noob
     Another avie in the night
     Blinded by the Life

Mama always told me not to look into the virtual sun
Oh, but Mama, that's where the fun is...

I was blinded...
I was blinded...
I was blinded...


[composed live on Twitter to the tune of "Blinded By The Light"]

... with apologies to the virtual Boss

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